Democratic Convention Humor

Ah, Sixteen Trillion Dollar Day!  I’ve improved the lyrics a bit.

Sixteen trillion and what do you get?

Another day older and deeper in debt.

Saint Peter don’t you call me ‘cause I can’t go

We owe our souls to the government dole.

 

Okay, so Barack says he needs a second term so that he can be on Mt. Rushmore.  Now don’t scoff.  If the American people want to vote him onto the mountain, they could do that.  Some say there isn’t room for another President on Rushmore.  Not true!  There is room for a whole second row of faces under the ones there now.  And I understand they are reserved that space for Democrats.  The other party has simply filled up their quota on the top. And we still await a really good Dem to start row #2.

1.     I was born in America when it was pure and free

Creatin’ new jobs and opportunities.

Went down in the recession and we got big food stamps

Obamacare, Redistribution and the Occupy tramps

 

I hope you didn’t miss Dick Durban being interviewed by Bret Baier.  Tricky Dick is head of the Platform Committee.  Baier asked him why phrases like “each person should have the opportunity to use their God-given ability” were deleted from the Platform in 2012 and why God who was referenced 7 times before is now out of the text.  Durban went ballistic.  He accused Baier of concluding the Republican notion that Dems were Godless and he was sick of it.  To which Baier simply said he had no such conclusion; he was just asking. To which Dick went wild again and insisted that Baier was drawing conclusions.  No, Brett insisted.  He was not.  Durban said that was good, because  any conclusion he might draw was wrong.  So Baier asked why the reference to Jerusalem as the capitol of Israel was left out this year.  Now Durban went really zonkers, saying that Baier was drawing conclusions again.  That this was just a platform and under no circumstances was anyone to draw any conclusions.  So there.  Try not to think about it.

 

2.     Some people think a man’s made outta mud

A rich man’s a turnip and we can get blood.

Divvy up to Obama and he wants every bit.

If you own a business, then you didn’t build it.

 

Of great interest is Obama’s handling of the economy.  Can anyone tell me how a President Handles an Economy.  I envision something like Discovery Channel’s Surgery series where the docs all have some guy opened up and they are handling the entrails.  Personally I don’t think Presidents handle the economy.  I’ve never observed this.  They all want a growing economy right?  And we know some of what that takes.  Like low interest rates so that businesses can borrow and grow.  So what can a President do about interest rates.  Well, short term rates come via the Fed which is an Open Market Committee of economists and bankers.  No President on the Fed.  Long term rates come via an international bond market.  Well, what about stimulating the economy with federal spending?  But then the Federal governments best efforts can only spend where government has interests, like National Parks and Military and Food Stamps.  Plus for every dollar taken in taxes, feds distribute only about 71 cents, because they are inefficient and there is much corruption in things like Medicaid.  And if a dollar spent doesn’t create an ongoing economic benefit (like a statue in the park which does nothing to make future economic effects), then it is just money down a rathole. About the best a Prez can do is talk like a cheerleader and step aside and let the free market provide growth as it will.  Presidents don’t stimulate, they can only stop building roadblocks. That’s right, Barack, you built it!

 

3.     If ya’ see me comin’ better step aside

51% of us take it outa your hide

We don’t pay no taxes and we hate the rich

We vote like Peronistas and we love to bitch.

 

Okay, so political cartoon of the week is Eric Allie’s picture of the eye doctor holding up an eyechart that says “$16,000,000,000,000.00 in debt” and the Democrat donkey squinting and reading “R-A-C-I-S-T”.  And did I notice that some guy named Castro is giving the keynote address for the Democrats tonight?  Hey!! Stop that!  I saw you drawing a conclusion.  I saw you throwing your arms in the air and saying, "I knew it!  I knew it was coming to that!"

 

Sixteen trillion and what do you get?

Another day older and deeper in debt.

Saint Peter don’t you call me ‘cause I can’t go

We owe our souls to the government dole.