Getting around government

I’m from that old school of keeping your nose clean and “subject yourselves to the ruling authorities” as St. Paul said. But pols put idiot laws in place and bureaucrats just do it.  As that old oil-finder Rufus LeBlanc used to say, “You gotta be smarter than what you messin’ with.”  Here are some tricks to get around government in the housing business.

            Light bulbs.  Feds outlawed incandescent bulbs.  So I bought about 400 bulbs in 2012.  Now I have used up all but the 100Ws so I have to go to Texas.  Texas has an exception for light bulb  who make bulbs in Texas can sell in Texas.  (not interstate commerce)  Go to Walmart in Gainesville and fill your trunk.  Why do landlords want incandescents? Renters take all the bulbs when they leave costing $30-50 every time a renter turns over.  But 22 cent incandescents = a couple bucks.  So my gamble to a three year supply, by which time I figured the price of CFL’s would decrease or another bulb would come along.  After all, people with migraines and other disorders can’t function with fluorescents.  (Does that make you want to go to Washington and kick some lawyer/legislator in the shins?)

            Sure enough, MIT is working on a new incandescent that saves 3.5 times the energy.  Will be on the market in 3 years.

            Roofs.  Some smarty pants decided to make a new code that says that composition shingle roofs can have no more than 2 layers and that the substrate must be continuous wood.  In the prior millennium it was always thought that wood shingles were a good substrate and the more layers of shingles added, the more waterproof.  Think of the consequences of this new code.  It means that an old roof must be stripped of shingles, new decking put on, and then a new roof, all done in a couple days before it rains.  Means a large roofing crew. And of course everything must be inspected.  The old days of hiring a wine-o for 20 bucks a square (100s.f.) is over.  It now costs about  $150 per square and the big crew guys have no competiton.  Roofing has become a “licensed and bonded skilled trade”.  Roofing guys drive around in $80,000 pickups.  And the roof is no better than it ever was. 

            Get around this by over-roofing with steel, which is still legal.  It was once twice as expensive as comp but is now about the same price.  Lasts 40 years. Pisses the code inspectors and other roofers off because they can’t legally stop you.  But your insurance will be a bit higher.  If you have a house fire, it is harder for firemen to chop through steel and blast water in an attic. 

            Motor Oil.  It is illegal to dump motor oil but not to treat railroad ties.  I got around the problem of renters who left me with undisposed oil by lining driveways with railroad ties and encouraging them to paint it on the ties when they finish a change.  Preserves my ties and landscaping.  Now if we could just figure out what to do about all those old tires they leave.  It costs $5 fee to take a tire to the dump.  It used to be $2 but then Kansas didn’t want all the old tires and they raised their fee to $5.  It worked for awhile as everyone brought their tires to OK.  So we had to raise the fee in retaliation.  Oh wait! I have a solution.  Collect old tires until the city has free dump week and then haul them off for No Fee. 

            Don’t Paint.  The EPA suddenly noticed that an Act from the 1970s allowed them to demand everyone have a license to paint.  Any property that is not your domicile must be painted by a licensed Lead Paint expert.  Any transgression will cost you a draconian $3250 per day.  It cost me $650 to get a lead license.  If I find lead, I must drape the entire building and use a white suit and proper disposal techniques. If only six square feet of surface is disturbed by any sort of repair (think of a HVAC guy putting in a return air duct) any paint and patch must be done by a guy like me.  So basically every old home in USA is now defined as a toxic waste dump.  In large cities, competitors make a game of turning each other in to the EPA. This law is so unpopular now, even among painters, that Obama’s EPA flying monkeys are turning it over to the states. (Funny.  Someone must have noticed that old 1970s law had this provision too.)

            But rather than drape a house with tarps, I just put on siding.  You can cover a surface and it is deemed undisturbed.  Likewise you can add a 3/8 inch layer of sheetrock to interiors and cover old walls too lead-y to simply paint.  Other than that, catch me if you can.

            Government is like a business that has never been re-organized.  I long for a President who will first order a thorough investigation into the EPA, re-organize and then hand out pink slips for everyone who has been part of these fiats.  Or give them new jobs or guarding the border in remote Sonora/Arizona.